Thursday, August 20, 2020

Quarantine

It's been 5 months.

Five months since schools were shut down, businesses were shuttered and the world as we knew it was at a stand still.   We've had an earthquake and hundreds of aftershocks.  We've had fear and panic and paranoia.  Those first few weeks and months were just horrible and awful, weren't they.  No idea if the whole corona virus was really going to kill us all, or if it was a hoax, or if it was here to stay.

Then, George Floyd was murdered in Minneapolis by those horrible police officers and the whole world erupted.  There are still protests every day around the country but they don't get much air time.  The news media has moved on to the upcoming election between Joe Biden and Donald Trump (heaven help us).

Five months later and we're wearing masks apparently in Salt Lake County through the end of 2020.  Places are sort of open, but with precaution.  In five months I've eaten inside of a restaurant twice and minus doctor and physical therapy appointments can count on two hands how many times I've been into a store.  I've been to the grocery store once and have turned into one of those crazy germ people whose cautiously optimistic and puts on a brave face for my kids but is also totally afraid of my own shadow.

Since the world went into panicked hibernation in March we've done the following.

*Sold our home of 9 years.
*Moved out of our home, into Ross parents town home in a 55+ community and lived there for 10 weeks.
*Online school from home (miserable experience)
*Ross working from home (stressful for all 5 of us, especially in a 2 bedroom town home in a 55+ community)
*Ankle surgery, 5 weeks in a wheelchair and all of the emotional baggage associated with throwing my life in a tailspin I wasn't quite prepared for.
*Moving into our new home.
*7 state road trip to Minnesota for a Howden family reunion (UT, WY, SD, ND, MN, MT, ID)
*Adjusting to a new house, more working from home, isolation, physical therapy, learning how to drive again, and continuing to isolate to keep everyone healthy.

The mental game the last five months has played on our family (I mean, on the world) has been intense.  I've seen my children suffer from bouts of intense anxiety and some mild depression.  My husband isn't meant to work from home.  I'm an introvert who needs her space and quiet time and that went out the window in March, even though there have been some moments of quiet in recent weeks where I've been alone and it's been good.

This has all just been so nuts.  There aren't words for what a disaster this has all been, or how intense it has been for every single American - well except for those ultra wealthy a-holes who keep getting ultra wealthier....but that's for another day.

There is a light at the end of the tunnel?  The boys go back to school next week, with masks on and pages and pages of safety precautions listed out by the schools.  But school will be so good.  Routine will be so good.  Friends and teachers and learning and a sense of normal, even though it isn't normal at all, will be so good.  Utah's covid cases have been dropping, or at least manageable, or whatever it is, and we're going back to school.  I'm not sure how long it will last - I'm hoping it will last for a while, but they are going back and maybe this madness can end for a bit.

Or maybe our lives will be like this forever.

Who knows.  It's been 5 months.  It *almost* feels normal now.  What's the rest of our lives, right?

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