Dennis the Menace

How does Murphy's Law for toddlers go? When the kid discovers that he can be destructive, he goes for it all in the same day? First of all, look at that face. Not my face, Elliott's. If that isn't the look of a cherubic tornado, I don't know what is.



Maybe it was because of the weather(rain, snow, sun, snow, rain, blizzard, sunshine), or the goofy toofy that's working it's way through, or because he discovered emotions and feelings in the last few days, but today was a bit trying. For lack of any other possible explanation, today was a bi-polar day - highs and lows to challenge the strongest medication - and the moderately patient mum.

Want evidence? Here you go.
1. In a matter of seconds, from the time it took to walk from the hamper to the washing machine, Elliott had the bathroom door open and toilet paper pulled from the roll all the way around the corner and almost to his room. I guess I should be impressed he didn't tear it off?

2. Elliott has a thing for the straw drawer and lucky for us, dad filled it up. Sweet. Now all the straws after being picked up 3 times today are covered in dust and whatever else lives on the kitchen floor.

3. We went outside to get the mail. It started SNOWING on us. Elliott wouldn't turn around and walk home. I was freezing. I finally picked him up and drug him kicking and screaming. After setting him down hoping the screaming would stop, he dropped to his knees and crawled home - yelling at me. Ripped his pants up good, too.

4. Threw everything he could get his hands on into the dryer when I wasn't looking and when I was.

5. Blew his nose into: my pants, his shirt, the towels, the shower curtain, his socks, my clean sheets, his hand.

6. At the grocery store turned all the way around in the little seat and starting throwing our items around the cart and out of the cart. I told him to stop as nicely as a mom in public tells her child to stop doing something and...he screamed at me...loudly!

7. Fell into the coffee table and barely escaped gouging his eye out on the corner.

8. Parked his riding Tonka truck on his foot.

9. Got stuck between the bed and my nightstand. Screamed!

10. Pooped twice and almost got to the contents in his diaper before I had a chance to whisk it away. While getting cleaned up, ate baby powder.

Arg! What a day. Welcome to the parent - hood, right?

At least today, he didn't bite me.

Anyone want to be our Mr. Wilson?

Bonus

This is the month of my wedding anniversary. I've been married a dozen or so days away from 5 years. To commemorate, yesterday I decided to throw away all the wedding cards we received on that fateful day - years ago. Ross told me that I couldn't throw them away unless I went through ALL OF THEM to see if any money was left.

I found a $20 and a check for $5 from a woman in Arizona whom Ross thinks has since passed.

We decided not to cash the check.

Across the Universe

In our home there is a great dividing line. Ross believes that you can only be a Rolling Stones fan ("I can't help it that they take up, like, 20% of my ipod library") or a Beatles fan - you cannot be both. I wholeheartedly agree and I choose the latter, not the former. There is one Stones song that I like - Moonlight Mile - that's it. As a group of men well into their geriatric years, I can't say that they do anything for me except gross me out. Keith Richards looks like the walking dead and come on, the guy tried to snort his own father's ashes. Where's the glory in that?

Anyway, I'm a Beatles fan. Yes, I thought Paul was the cutest but I have to say that my favorite Beatles songs are some of the song's George wrote. Ross says that the Beatles are more popular than the Stones, at least in memory, because they aren't a band anymore and because two of them are dead - and the Stone Age is still touring. I disagree again. I think that the Beatles will forever be more popular because their music is more timely, they were a better band, and unlike Mickey and the boys still feeding their drug habits, women habits, and tight jean habits, the Beatles knew when to quit- even if it wasn't a pretty end.

With all that being said, Ross, Elliott and I watched Across the Universe this week. I really liked it. So much in fact that I went out and bought the soundtrack and I can't tell you the last time I did that. It's awesome. It's amazing for me to see such a creative and heart-felt interpretation of songs I've grown up singing along to. The story was a bit predictable but good, the songs fit in beautifully and above all, I found the interpretation of Beatles music for this film fascinating. It's brought whole new meaning to songs I've never paid that much attention to and, at the same time turned on my conspiratorial brain a bit.

Most of us know that the Beatles put hidden meanings, which most of the public at the time thought were about drugs, into a lot of their songs. Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds was about LSD, Hey Jude about Heroin, the cover of Abby Road about the death of Paul McCartney. Now, I was totally into the Paul McCartney death story when I was a kid and remember listening to it on some tapes my dad had. It blew my mind....but I digress. After watching the movie (If only I'd watched it with my sister then we could really dissect it) it was almost like those songs were meant to have the meanings that the movie portrayed. "I want you" was maybe really about (or secretly about) an overpowering government/military establishment trying to stick it to the common man, and "Hey Jude" was maybe really a letter to a dear friend about not giving up and fighting for the girl, and "All my lovin'" was maybe really about - well, all my lovin'. Okay, not too much interpretation there.

Anywhoo - I really liked the movie and thought it was cool. Very Moulin Rouge in it's film effects, but very good none-the-less. It's kind of cool to see a band, who's songs really could be a soundtrack for a lot of our lives, brought to life in a movie.

And, the kid who plays Jude is very cute. Where'd they find him?

Baby Friday - What a difference a year makes

The picture speaks for itself, but its pretty obvious that the little monkey has done a bit of growing in the last year.

Because it's my blog

hello friends. I haven't posted in a while. Not much to say. I just wanted to share a few things with you, because I can.

First, a month or so ago, I got some literature from an organization called the "nature conservancy" in the mail. heard of them? Yeah, me, too.

The theme of the literature was solicitation with the animal of choice being an or-an-gu-tan. We like monkeys and apes in our house so I was intrigued. For just $15 I would get a membership and a free gift. Yes a free, $15 dollar gift. The gift was a plush or-an-gu-tan and I was sold. You see, my monkey loves monkeys (and apes) so I was psyched.

Well a few weeks ago I got my official membership gear but no plush FREE gift. I was bummed - it appeared that a sucker I was.

Last Saturday though, as I ventured to get the mail, what to my surprise but a gift from the organization itself - in a tube. It was my orange ape. It looks nothing like an ape. Its so hideously non-ape like in its features and characteristics that I dare not share an image of it with you. Shouldn't an organization that tries to protect wildlife at least offer a realistic impression of that wildlife in it's free gifts? Yeah, that's what I thought.

Second, I have an addiction. No, not that! My addiction is Walgreen's. I love that store as much as I love breathing. I broke myself of the habit and haven't been for a long time. That pleased Ross because a visit to Walgreen's for me is like a visit to Costco for the rest of you - you go in needing one thing and you walk out having spent an embarassing amount of money. I went to Walgreen's last week to pick up some prints and it just so happens that I had time to spare, and Elliott was happy, and we did need to walk up and down every aisle...in the end I spent $60 on absolute treasures. One of which was this:

Can I just say this thing is awesome! My feet have never been better. I might use it on Ross when he's asleep to try and get rid of some of his scales. If you want to borrow it, you betcha! One suggestion - don't "ped egg" your feet in bed. That's kind of gross.

Third - though I'm a wee bit embarrassed to admit it (thanks Ann for already mentioning it on your blog), I'm not ashamed. I signed up for their e-mails months ago and have been waiting with baited breath for their return. I've checked the website a few times. I'll DVR their performance this Friday on the Today show. I still know their names, I watched the surreal life and Band of Brothers because of them. And the secret spot in my heart that I have saved (along with my t-shirt from their concert the weekend before I started 7th grade that I have never ever worn just in case it could be used for the antique roadshow by my grandchildren) from being 12 years old and in love with my first (and only) boy band is ready and rearin' to go. Need I say more?


Oh, Jordan Knight...where have you been all my life?


American Idol, eat your heart out!