preface: I loathe the mall. I despise the mall. Shopping? I can't stand shopping, it sort of makes me depressed, my skin crawl a bit and sometimes, just sometimes, I throw up in my mouth a little.
Okay, here's the dilemma. Part One: I need pants, preferably a good pair of jeans. You know, denim? Fall is approaching faster than my wardrobe is prepared for. Part Two: I am what you call a "big girl". I'm very tall, 30 lbs over weight, still sort of in between sizes because of all this baby stuff, and just a real physical specimen at the moment. Part three: I don't enjoy shopping, I don't like "skinny jeans" and I don't enjoy displaying my butt crack to the general public (they'll thank me for it later).
I remember when I was a kid and we had to go school shopping for new jeans. It seems that the shopping excursions always ended up with me in tears after what felt like an eternity in a dressing room with my mom throwing pants over the door by the dozens for me to try on and discover that, yes, that pair doesn't fit either.
So, yesterday, out of desperation, I ventured to the Mall. Bad news for so many reasons, the worst of which, it was a Saturday and the mall was packed. Where do all these people get all their extra money? I just don't get it.
Anyway, the first store, tried on three pair. And? Found my size, good start right? Wrong. The experience at store one Sucked! Nothing fits right and my thunderous thighs are not designed for the teeny, tiny openings of pants marketed towards itty bitty high school girls. I venture to store two...they carry "long", but in nothing bigger than a size 6. I'm bigger than a size 6. Store three carries "long" too, and they have my size. I try on three more pair of jeans. One actually fits, sort of except that it's a little baggy in the crotch, which is surprising considering that the waist nearly hits me in my armpits. The wash is a little too dark, and they are a little too stretchy, but guess what...I'm desperate and I decide to purchase the pants.
I walk to the counter to pay. I'm a paying customer. The retail provider starts harassing me! "Our jeans are buy one get one half off" she says to me. "Why don't you go and grab another pair," she states. "Thanks, but I'm a hard girl to find a pair of jeans for, and there aren't any more in my size", I retort. "Come on, there's got to be another pair," she fires back. "Nope, there isn't" I say. "Well, then how about this watch, it's only $4," she says to me. At that point, I should have left the store and taken my desperation elsewhere. I didn't. I bought the mom jeans and left, depressed. I don't like spending money and I don't like buying ugly pants.
I walked into another store. The pushy sales woman who was old enough to either be close to retirement, or at home with her cats and not in a retail facility approached me, wanting to "help" me. I told her I was fine and was just looking and walked back to the jeans. At this, my 4th, and what would be my final, store I noticed that the jeans, some of them came in "long" too. Now, this is a store that I frequent both in person and online and never have I seen Long jeans or any pant for that matter in their store, I've always had to go online. The cat lady w/ the pouf of hair approached me. "Yes, we've got talls" she states. I say, "I know, I've just noticed that. You've never carried talls in store before." Cat lady then starts to argue with me, "Why yes, we have for years, you just must not come in enough." I replied with a sharp, "Oh yes, I am an avid shopper of this establishment and it has NEVER carried talls in store!" Then, I walked out.
Why do dumb ladies in stores want to harass and argue with me? I don't understand.
Anyway, I got home with my ugly mom jeans, tried them on for Ross and with a look of discouragement on both our faces, I said that I would take them back this coming week. He said that would probably be a good idea and that maybe I'm not destined to wear denim pants ever again.
He might be right. Perhaps, Nacho Libre and I are destined to wear stretchy pants, for the rest of our lives.
Did I mention that I loathe the mall?
Okay, here's the dilemma. Part One: I need pants, preferably a good pair of jeans. You know, denim? Fall is approaching faster than my wardrobe is prepared for. Part Two: I am what you call a "big girl". I'm very tall, 30 lbs over weight, still sort of in between sizes because of all this baby stuff, and just a real physical specimen at the moment. Part three: I don't enjoy shopping, I don't like "skinny jeans" and I don't enjoy displaying my butt crack to the general public (they'll thank me for it later).
I remember when I was a kid and we had to go school shopping for new jeans. It seems that the shopping excursions always ended up with me in tears after what felt like an eternity in a dressing room with my mom throwing pants over the door by the dozens for me to try on and discover that, yes, that pair doesn't fit either.
So, yesterday, out of desperation, I ventured to the Mall. Bad news for so many reasons, the worst of which, it was a Saturday and the mall was packed. Where do all these people get all their extra money? I just don't get it.
Anyway, the first store, tried on three pair. And? Found my size, good start right? Wrong. The experience at store one Sucked! Nothing fits right and my thunderous thighs are not designed for the teeny, tiny openings of pants marketed towards itty bitty high school girls. I venture to store two...they carry "long", but in nothing bigger than a size 6. I'm bigger than a size 6. Store three carries "long" too, and they have my size. I try on three more pair of jeans. One actually fits, sort of except that it's a little baggy in the crotch, which is surprising considering that the waist nearly hits me in my armpits. The wash is a little too dark, and they are a little too stretchy, but guess what...I'm desperate and I decide to purchase the pants.
I walk to the counter to pay. I'm a paying customer. The retail provider starts harassing me! "Our jeans are buy one get one half off" she says to me. "Why don't you go and grab another pair," she states. "Thanks, but I'm a hard girl to find a pair of jeans for, and there aren't any more in my size", I retort. "Come on, there's got to be another pair," she fires back. "Nope, there isn't" I say. "Well, then how about this watch, it's only $4," she says to me. At that point, I should have left the store and taken my desperation elsewhere. I didn't. I bought the mom jeans and left, depressed. I don't like spending money and I don't like buying ugly pants.
I walked into another store. The pushy sales woman who was old enough to either be close to retirement, or at home with her cats and not in a retail facility approached me, wanting to "help" me. I told her I was fine and was just looking and walked back to the jeans. At this, my 4th, and what would be my final, store I noticed that the jeans, some of them came in "long" too. Now, this is a store that I frequent both in person and online and never have I seen Long jeans or any pant for that matter in their store, I've always had to go online. The cat lady w/ the pouf of hair approached me. "Yes, we've got talls" she states. I say, "I know, I've just noticed that. You've never carried talls in store before." Cat lady then starts to argue with me, "Why yes, we have for years, you just must not come in enough." I replied with a sharp, "Oh yes, I am an avid shopper of this establishment and it has NEVER carried talls in store!" Then, I walked out.
Why do dumb ladies in stores want to harass and argue with me? I don't understand.
Anyway, I got home with my ugly mom jeans, tried them on for Ross and with a look of discouragement on both our faces, I said that I would take them back this coming week. He said that would probably be a good idea and that maybe I'm not destined to wear denim pants ever again.
He might be right. Perhaps, Nacho Libre and I are destined to wear stretchy pants, for the rest of our lives.
Did I mention that I loathe the mall?
5 comments:
I totally understand. One denim tip. Look at the zipper length before trying them on. I got my size, tryed them on and the zipper was 3in. long, you can only imagin.
I also struggle with jeans. It took me 6 months to find some that I will wear. This is not a tall person only problem. I cannot buy them at some stores because they mark there sizes 4 sizes to small and I just cannot face the larger numbers. I don't feel that pants should look like tights with zippers and they should keep my bottom covered at all times, especially while playing with my toddler.
So I searched and searched and searched. And found some and bought 3 pairs. One short and two regulars. Hopefully they will last me a while I despise shopping for jeans.
I hear there is some name brand jean store over in the warehouse district (21st South) that sells all kinds of magical and fantastic jeans.
Oh. Here is the address:
Big Rock Clothing Co. – Look for the Red Door
1003 West 3160 South
So. Salt Lake
801.973.9350
I guess they are having a jean sale right now.
ok so i'm not tall...but a respectable 5'7".....and the GAP stopped making the ONLY fit of jeans i've ever liked. and my last & final pairs (pre-baby pairs) are getting too holy. not in the biblical way. so now i buy khakis and cargo pants.
ug. it gats old. i ave no idea what to do when winter comes. i think i have some cords that will tide me over this fall.
so i'm in that destined to never waer jeans again category. i'm not sure if there is a market for regular women that aren't a zero with no thighs/butt. maybe we should start our own company & call it "junk in the trunk jeans" because i certainly don't have the "gaps" that i used to.
I too hate shopping for jeans and am not particularly fond of the mall. Although I admit to excessive shopping when it comes to my kids clothes. I too find that I often have to buy my jeans online and am often pleased with Eddie Bauer's, just my 2 cents...
I feel your pain. In fact, I wondered throughout your pregnancy where you managed to find pants that were (1)tall enough and (2) weren't a size 4. Just WONDERING... I'm not announcing anything.
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