On Saturday Ross and I decided to go to a movie. It is important however to note that Ross and I not only have extreme differences of opinion on movies and are nearly polar opposites, but I want to state for the record, that I NEVER get to pick the movie that we see. If there is a film out that I am interested in I either see it with my sister or it is rented and I watch it alone. So, my Saturday night choices (we had not been to a movie since Thanksgiving when we saw, Walk the Line...Ross' pick) were DaVinci, X-men, or the one starring America's favorite crazy fruit, MI:III. Faced with the daunting task of picking from three winners I deffered to Ross and he settled on, DaVinci. I was less than thrilled but at least it starred "real" people, not mutants or celebrity scientologists.
It is also important to note, before I get into my thoughts on the film, that I am a realist when it comes to movies. I don't like the improbable, fanciful, or supremely imaginary. I only want to see extreme violence if it is heroic and war related, and I need to be able to believe the characters, otherwise it is a waste of time. With all this in mind, here are my thoughts.
- Who thought Forrest Gump would be good for the roll of le Professeur with long hair?
- Since when do Albinos have blue eyes?
- How can an elderly man who has suffered a fatal belly wound wander half way around le Louvre with a magic pen writing down secret codes and clues?
- Why must the blue-eyed albino constantly charge out of the darkenss with a knife or gun? How many times must he do this before it gets old. (A toss up here for MI:III...ripping of masks throughout the film or charging knife-wielding flaggelating monks).
- How is it that half-whit Americans who subsist off of CSI and Law and Order can not only always outwit the police in film, but can always out-wit French Police?
- Miranda vs. Arizona was an American case about rights when being arrested...since when do the British Police read criminals their Miranda Rights?
- Where is DaVinci? The only element of the great mind is in the random view of paintings in the museum and the small scene where Magneto talks about "The Last Supper"...rumor has it that the book has much more detail but shouldn't that have been in the movie as well?
- I am supposed to believe that a crippled professor orchestrated the whole thing? How did he know that the prof. would come to his house?
- If someone wants to shoot you, they will...a flock if pigeons isn't going to stop them.
- Like Forrest Gump wasn't going to throw the Cryptix into the air....
- Enough with the flashbacks already!!!!
- I am supposed to believe that a french cryptologist is not only happy and okay with the fact that she is the last living heir to Mary Magdalene, but that she is willing to stay with a bunch of strangers that covered up her life for 30 years and probablly killed her parents? yeah, right.
- 2 and a half hours? Come on!
I could go on, but I wont. A friend of mine challenged me a week or two ago to read the book, but to that friend, I must say, I am so sorry....I cannot. For, I saw the film and it did sucketh!
10 comments:
Well then, check this movie out from the library. The Da Vinci Code Decoded That is really the stuff that is interesting anyway. It is a documentary that talks a lot about Da Vinci and the heir of Jesus Christ. Really, this you might actually find appealing. This is the stuff that got me really interested. Not the book and all the fake drama and romance.
okay, I'll check out the documentary...that sounds like it is much more up my alley anyway. ;)
You should know very well that you can't judge the book because of a liberal interpretation of the film. Stop trying to avoid conforming to a perceived flaw in pop culture and crack open the book!!!
Nice header. Are you running for congress also?
Wow... she's pretty bitter about politicians!!
sorry, sometimes I get on weird kicks. Well, actually, I am probably always slightly grumpy and tactless.
glad you guys are having a personal conversation on my blog. nothing I've ever written has had so many comments. Perhaps I'll join "still blinking" on the grumpy and tactless bandwagon. :)
In response to your "thoughts" on the DaVinci Code, I think you totally missed the boat on this one. I do agree that that your Forrest Gump would have been safer with a haircut.
The guy was NOT an albino. His hair had a red and brown tint. He looked albino because he was always runnin around in that monk outfit. He was covering up all the time. Not to mention the prison sentence he had lived out. No sun = extra pale skin. Also, did you notice he was always "penalizing" himself. Part of the pale skin was from loss of blood and his "suffering penance". The whipping? Ring a bell?
Elderly man did NOT have a belly wound. Did you notice the down shot? He was shot in a valid place for him to wander around writing secret clues-which were not so far apart nor as numerous as you are portraying. Also, where there's a will there's a way. A body will truly only give up when the spirit is willing.
Agreed on the guy coming out of the darkness, but he can't charge. Remember: he has that thorn chain around his leg. Its more of a hobble run. That, and he's not albino.
French Police are dumb? Okay, maybe not, but you do realize that most crimes committed in these the United States are caused by the government which in reality run all police forces. So the people they catch aren't really the ones that commit the crime anyway. Its a big government conspiracy. Maybe the French Police really DO look for the true culprit.
True, Miranda vs. Arizona was an American case, but most every country uses something similar. Its just that here it is LAW by said case. Travel the world, you'll see. The police didn't use the Miranda Rights verbatim. But something similar. Listen more carefully!
DaVinci seems to really only be included, because he was one of the only artists that believed and painted this whole "holy grail" idea. Subliminal in the paintings viewed throughout the museum, as well as his genius in creating the cryptix. The cryptix is indeed a true creation of DaVinci. Who knew he's not just some painter.
Oh yeah, where's DaVinci? Um, well, DaVinci is dead. Breathe easy. It didn't happen yesterday or even in the filming of the movie. Been gone for a long time. Or did you miss that part of history?
The crippled Professor didn't orchestrate that Gump would show up at his house. It just made it alot easier for him to obtain his goal. He sent the "albino who isn't really an albino" to get the information. When the professor wouldn't break the pact, he had to be killed so as not to mess it up. With him dead, they had to find someone else that knew.
The shooters were supposedly very religious. It wasn't the pigeons that stopped them. It was a monestary! A cathedral! Also, a gun is not the only thing that frightens pigeons into flight. They were breaking the law. How did they know there wasn't someone or something else that frightened them into flight. Thus, they hide the gun or maybe they only had a couple bullets. Let's not waste them hunting for birds.
They didn't kill her parents! Accident! The "strangers" didn't even know where she was when she left her "grandfather's" home.
No, you don't have to believe any of it. This is exactly why those Catholics are so confused! Because they actually believe warped stuff like this. Good thing you've got the truth!
I didn't want to see the movie either. I was dragged into it as well. I spent the entire movie laughing cuz it was ridiculous. But you were looking for all the incredulities that you missed the detail.
SO, that's all. Maybe you should watch it again. You missed it all anyway. It'll be like the first time!
He was an albino you stupid cow (kjersten)- and it is called a cilice, not a 'thorn chain' thingy. If you have not read the book, you are not allowed to comment. Go back to your hole until the next big movie release.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Silas_(The_Da_Vinci_Code)
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