16 Candles......

Holy Freakin' Cow.

My baby brother,  the one whose impending arrival into the world 16 years ago left me in a state of shock and awe, the one whose made my life, and the life of my family and my boys so much more exciting, the one who just the other day, still sat on my lap for a few minutes even though he's a giant and thank heavens he didn't fart, is 16 years old today.

It's hard to believe.  Really, it is.



Who'd a thunk that this kid who, 8 years ago (half his life ago) when I got married wasn't even shoulder high, would now be taller than me, stretching himself out at night for a few more inches.  Or, that he'd be wearing a size 15 shoe.






He's tall and handsome.  He's smart and funny.  He's kind and sincere.  He takes honors classes and gets good grades.  He's a good writer and a good ice shaver.  He willingly plays with his crazy nephews and lets them use him as a bean bag chair.  He sings, he goes to dances, he isn't too cool to go bowling with his parents and sisters on his Christmas break.

If you get the chance to meet him, he'll let you know that one day, he's going to be famous.  He looks good in purple.  He's a really good basketball player.

I don't know what we'd all do without him.



He's my baby bwudur, and I luf him a lot.

Abundance

Every year it's the same thing.  The Grinch in me arrives around the first of November.  Something happens to make my heart grow three sizes around the beginning of December.  Then around the middle of December, the spirit of giving, and of Christ, and of generosity of heart and spirit - mind and body arrives and I feel the need to be nice.  To do nice things.  To be generous with time and money - and food and labor - and by the time Christmas rolls around, I really feel spent.

I'm tired.  I've spent a lot of time figuring out how to give and help others.  This year we didn't do anything really awesome.  I donated coats and hats and gloves to some "inner city" families. I knitted some hats for my brothers eagle scout project.  I donated to a "sub for santa" for a family in my neighborhood hit by some tragedy right after Thanksgiving.  I made a billion cupcakes with a friend to give to neighbors.  I gave gift cards to people, taped to their doors on Christmas Eve.

Yesterday my little family and I were bombarded by love.  Isn't that what Christmas is all about?  Being with the people you love, who love you back.  We were gifted wonderfully generous and thoughtful items - things to make our lives more fun, entertaining, relaxing, and purposeful.  We were gifted a trip to Disneyland by my parents, all we need to do is set the date (oh, I'm so excited).  We were treated to food and family and laughs and hugs.

We served each other.

Isn't that what life is all about?  Serving our fellow man?  It isn't about the presents one day a year, but about how we can help people all year long.

Yesterday was a great day.  One of those days where "our cup runeth over".  There are so many stories and pictures - they'll come later.

But right now, can I tell you I loved Christmas.  I loved going to church today, the day after Christmas.  It was such a blessed reminder of why, at least for me, we do all that we do all year long.  As a kid and a young adult, the holiday was such a let down.  So much build up for one short day.  As an adult however, and as a mom, I really think (at least I hope) that I've figured it out.  I hope I've figured out what this season is about.  And I pray that I can always do my part to help those around me and that I can be guided to those that may need my help.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to you all - all 10 of you who read this thing, including my mom.

Ho! Ho! Ho!

Merry Christmas.

Love the Reindeer


And the boy who sits on the counter

Annie.I.am

Two weeks ago I resigned from the job I have done for nearly 6 years. Today is my last day of work. At the end of the day I'll turn in my computer, ipod, name tags, hair nets, keys, and the kitchen sink.

Six years ago, when I left the classroom, I was desperate to get out and find a change of scene - a change of pace. I LOVED teaching history. I LOVED the kids that were my students. I just couldn't do it anymore. The job felt too hard and stifling and like it was choking me. I did it for almost 6 years and was ready to move on.

I left the high school in a flurry and found what I thought at the time was a great job.  To commemorate the event, because the timing just worked out that way, Ross and I went to Italy. Oh, Florence. You served my brain well.

Fast forward another 6 years. I really LIKED my job. I really LIKED the teachers that I got to work with in the world of online learning. LIKE does not however, a great job make. When I was walking away from  staff meetings with stomach aches...or in tears (how pathetic does that make me, right?), or dwelt on a snarky e-mail for too many days I realized it was time to suck it up and vacate the premises.

That's what I've done and I've done it without a net. Right now, there is no job to fall back on, no career to advance no Italy to visit. 

There is just me.

Annie.I.am

The best me that I can be.  Holding my head up high.  Knowing that I did a great job.  Knowing that right now, where I'm supposed to be is at home, with my kids, being their mom, and fixing myself - becoming a better me with new goals and experiences on the horizon.  Taking deep breaths and leaps of faith.  It's scary - but a very exciting time.  A new frontier in the life of Annie.

I had a teacher send me an e-mail and tell me that she hoped that I resigned for something bigger and better.

I told her that right now, I'm running away!  But, in the next few months the something bigger and better will come.

In the spirit of giving....

My grandma is 80 years old. She is the mother of 8 children, all living. Those children all have children, and some even have grandchildren. She has a big family. She loves her big family. She buys Christmas presents for her big family - totalling 53 people and counting.

My grandma's lungs don't work very well.  She's on oxygen all the time.  She's lost close to 80 pounds this year and has become so much smaller than the grandma of my childhood.  Her legs don't work so hot and neither do her ears.  She still though has an amazing spirit and light about her.  She's tired and in pain nearly every single day.  She passes out a lot and just a week ago fell so hard that she bruised her entire leg.  She could win an award for that bruise.  She's a fighter.  She's got amazing faith.  She watches "All my Children" every single day.

I love my grandma dearly.  She has taken care of me my entire life.  My sister and I, when we were younger could count on my grandma for everything.  One phone call and she'd be wherever we needed her, whenever we needed her.  She was my official chauffeur all through school, even picking me up as a senior in high school.  In fact, the first time I ever ditched a class was the last week of my senior year and grandma was the one who came to pick me up, take me to the 7-11 for a coke, and let me hang out at her house all afternoon.

Anyway, back to the presents.  Like I said, she buys presents for about 53 people.  She has a book, her gift bible, that lists everything she has purchased.  She has another book, even bigger, with receipts, catalog order numbers and everything else she needs.  She's organized and thoughtful and does her best to give everyone gifts that they will love.

We all know that every Christmas we'll get socks.  It's important for my Grandma make sure we have socks.  As a kid, she had to darn her own socks or go with out and shove cardboard in her shoes to help keep her feet dry. - the great depression can do that to a kid.

I've talked about it on this blog before, but it is my designated task, for the last many years (I really cannot remember how many) to help wrap presents.  Last year I wrapped most of them by myself and it took me several days and over 15 hours to get it all done.  This year, my sister, cousin and I got it knocked out in two nights - in about 10 hours.  My back is still sore a couple days later.

Think about it.  53 people.  Each person has at least 3 packages to wrap.  For the little kids, every present is wrapped individually so the kiddies have more to open.  That's over 200 presents to wrap and we did it in 10 hours - and I wrapped a few that I picked up yesterday to even things out at my house this morning.

My grandma is amazing.  How she does this every year I don't know.  I love her so much.  I love wrapping presents for her.  I love spending time at her house.  I haven't been the best visitor lately - I let life get in the way - but I hope that my grandma knows how much I love and appreciate her and all she does for our family.