Wednesday, November 30, 2011

The first day of advent

In years past, we've always done the cardboard chocolate a day advent calendar.  I love cheap and waxy chocolate as much as the next person but this year I wanted to do something else, something experiential for me and the boys (and our dad and other family members when applicable.).

It's embarrassing to admit, but I started looking for cute advent calendar themes and templates in the middle of October.  I was totally inspired when I got a new Garnet Hill catalog and this gorgeous advent was prominently displayed in it's pages.  But, I wasn't going to pay $100 and I needed something "bigger".

After weeks and weeks of searching for little stockings and socks and gloves and all that sort of thing I walked past the dollar bin at Target and found super cute little felt bags that were perfect for stuffing with treasure, hanging on my stairs railing, and using year after year.

Once the packaging was in place, it was time to figure out our advent experiences.  I used the Internet and my boys interests to guide me, of course, but I think that we are going to have 24 days of awesome fun.  And, for each of the days, I've got a small trinket, toy, or candy to keep the boys interested.

New Phineus and Ferb Christmas CD
Make paper snowflakes to hang on the windows
Make Christmas cards for great grandparents
Build part of the nativity and read scriptures
Shop for Sub-for-Santa
New Christmas book to read
Make a Christmas ornament
Make hot chocolate (deliver sub-for-Santa)
Watch a Christmas movie and eat popcorn
Christmas activity downtown (movie?)
Build part of the nativity and read scriptures
Activity with Petersen's and Binggeli's
Make a treat for primary teachers and Mrs. Stratford
Zoo lights with Grandma and Grandpa Howden
Make felt Christmas trees
Make a snowman or have a snowball fight
Get a Christmas cookie from Schmidts bakery
Build part of the nativity and read scriptures
Buy food for the food bank (buy and leave at smiths)
Play in the snow (paint and blow bubbles)
Go for a drive to look at Christmas lights
Gingerbread houses with Haley, Molly, Willie, Parker and Meranda
Early Christmas w/ Howdens' (make cookies)
Christmas Eve treasure hunt

The bags were hung on the railing with care last night after the boys were asleep.  

Tomorrow starts advent for my boys.  So excited.

24 days for advent

Such cute bags for my boys advent. Thanks @target. I love the dollars bins

The boys got to open the day one activity/gift this morning before their dad left for work. Elliott definitely "gets it" and is excited. Wyatt got mad that he didn't get to open whatever one he wanted. Oh well, I'm sure he will figure it out as we go through the days of the month. And today, the only way to pry them away from Phineus and Ferb on the TV was because I knew I had an equally awesome platypus gift for them to share this morning.


Tuesday, November 29, 2011

My "beef" with Thanksgiving

The evening before Thanksgiving last week, my wonderful mother knocked on my door and with the help  of some devoted cousins, whisked my children away for the evening.  They wanted some time with their grandma and their grandma wanted them without me, their mother.  (On the latter, I cannot blame her, Sam I am!  I'd want those boys away from me, too.)

The tired monkeys returned home many hours later with brand new twinner lighting mcqueen pajamas, smiles on their faces, stories to tell, and the remnants of their Slurpee's still in their cups.

My husband arrived home a little bit early that evening from work, walked in the door and asked me what we should do.  He suggested we clean bathrooms.  I said "No! You are taking me out to dinner!"  After much discussion, we settled on a trip to Target for some Christmas shopping and a dinner at 5 guys for some burgers and Cajun fries.  I did drink water and only ate the fries that fell out of the cup in the bag so that made it healthy.

Driving home that night, to curl up on the couch and watch a documentary about the Helvetica Font (his choice) we had a discussion about Thanksgiving Day, holidays in general, and food.

I posed the question:

"Why isn't there a beef holiday?  I mean, why don't we have a holiday where we eat prime rib?"

My husband turned to me, laughed, and immediately pulled out his phone to mock me on face book with a status update, "My wife wants to know why there isn't a beef holiday."

Ignoring the mocking, I was posing a serious and to me, baffling question.  Why isn't there a holiday where a big hunk of beef is the main course? I know we eat burgers all summer long, and I like ham for Easter, but why not a giant roast for Thanksgiving?

Forgetting a bit about my lamentations we moved on to the turkey day itself.  When it was my turn to dish up a plate of food I stared rather longingly at the spread thinking, "There isn't a traditional Thanksgiving Day food that I like to eat." (Poor me, right?)

Yams gross me out.  Green beans when cooked with bacon and shallots and brown sugar are delish, but not baked in a pan with some cream of mushroom soup and crumbled onions.  I've seen stuffing be made from scratch before and cannot stomach the thought of eating soggy bread and other junk that's been thrown in.  The actual turkey itself, if I consume too much (more than a few small slices) gives me a stomach ache - several turkey days in a row in fact.

My dinner consisted of carrots (that Ross prepared in an orange balsamic glaze with fresh chives that were delish), mashed potatoes, and a teeny tiny bit of turkey and gravy.

I also ate dessert, but just the stuff that I brought because I don't particularly care for pie, though all the pies looked lovely with golden brown crusts and I should have taken a picture of them all but I forgot.  (Yes, I know we could engage in a whole pie vs. cake debate, but we can save that for a different blog.)

Cookie dough in a chocolate cup.

Chocolate cupcakes with salted carAmel frosting.

I am so grateful for the holiday of Thanksgiving.  I love being able to spend time with all my family and this past Thanksgiving I had a tremendously wonderful time - the best I've had in years!  It is always fun to squish in my grandpa's house and then dash to the basement when the meal is over to find the cool air.  This year, to keep and the big and little kids occupied, I even brought crafts.  We did stickers, and made bracelets and pins and did thumb print art and had drawing contests.  It was so much fun.

Made all kids under 25 do t-day crafts yesterday. Huge success.

I'm just not a fan of the food.  It's funny how traditions are created and stuck with for years and years and years.  I guess for most folks, its the one time of year to break out the jellied cranberry sauce and that's really important.  I'm just one of those people who, if I were in charge of Thanksgiving, this would be my #1 menu of choice:

*A cross-rib roast coated in olive oil and lemon pepper cooked for 24 hours on very low heat.
*Carrots and potatoes roasted in the oven until they are so soft they melt like butter in your mouth.
*Grilled asparagus with a dash of lemon and sea salt.
*Home made croissants to make Julia Child proud.
*Chocolate molten cake or some sort of chocolate truffle torte for dessert.

Or, if it was going to be a small group, we'd go French:

*Beef Bourguignon (with lots of onions, carrots, and delicious goodness)
*Roasted garlic mashed potatoes
*Green beans in melted brown sugar with crispy bacon and fried shallots on top
*Croissants (yes, please!)
*Something Frency for dessert, like eclairs (for my guests), or Napoleon's or mini raspberry and strawberry tarts.

Now those are some meals that would make me very, very thankful.  And full.  And fat!

Monday, November 28, 2011

A typical Sunday night

Every Sunday we join the family for dinner at my mom's house.  We eat at 5:00 pm, but everyone gets there a little bit early and then after dinner we hang out all night.  It seems that each and every Sunday though, we fall into the same routines.  Everyone sits in the same spots, does the same stuff, and we talk and laugh, and some of us (dad!) snore a bit.

Last night I decided to do a quick run through the house to photograph everyone in their designated spots.

Cherry dump cake for dessert. Yum!

Last night we ate dessert first. Cherry dump cake, a family favorite.

Sunday night 1:  my brother doing math homework

That handsome brother of mine, who will never tweet me back because he says twitter isn't for conversations even though he twits back all the other people he tweets with, doing his hard math problems for his math teacher who, whenever anyone asks her a question says, "My husband is nearly blind!"

Sunday night 2:  the math teacher helping with homework

The super smart math teacher sister helping the handsome brother with his hard math problems.

Sunday night 3:  grandma and the kids w Elmo on the computer

All the little chillin's with grandma ma. Usually, they are in the basement playing air hockey, pirate dinosaurs, or watching bull riding. Last night they were all playing Elmo in Grouch land on the computer.

Sunday night 4:  the football watchers and sleepers

The over 30 men's crowd watching football, reading tweets about football, sleeping through football, and making work appointments for the next day while watching football. Once football ends, they'll find something else to watch, usually ESPN classic or some "fat guy eating greasy food" show.

Sunday night 5:  me being bored because they are talking about taxes.

And then, there's me. Last night, like most Sunday nights, I don't really have a crowd. I float. I'm too dumb to do math. I'm too lazy to entertain the kids (though Molly wog did sit on my lap for like 15 minutes, a record, to watch Elmo movies on my phone). I'm too disinterested to watch football. I'm too unemployed to talk about taxes. Sometimes I'll color a picture.

Saturday, November 26, 2011

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas!

Working on my Christmas tree. Really just making a mess.

Today was a first in our little family.  There are still 4 days left in November and all the Christmas decorations are out.  There are a few more little things I plan to do to make the spirit bright, but it feels festive in our house.  The tree is up and decorated.  The stockings are hung by the chimney.  The pine candle has been lit.  Tonight after dinner we watched "The Grinch", had a roaring fire, and drank home made hot chocolate.

Hot chocolate anyone?

All but two of the Christmas presents are purchased and I'm working on setting up a sub-for-Santa project for us to participate in.

I received my Christmas cards in the mail on Wednesday and I already have all the envelopes addressed.  I won't be sending them out yet, still some work to do.

I'm almost finished with the awesome "activity a day" advent calendar I'm working on for the boys (and me).  We just need some snow so we can build a snowman, blow bubbles that will freeze, catch snowflakes on frozen black paper, and paint a rainbow.

I have a fabulous top secret present in the works for my husband.  He has no idea and he might cry.  Power tools are so emotional.  He isn't planning to get me anything (we have a deal every year - no presents, but I cheat every year) so I already bought myself a new dress (from him of course because I have no income) to wear to church on Christmas Sunday - I just need a navy blue cardigan.

Ah yes, the spirit of the holidays has hit early this year - and the boys were absolutely crazy today to prove it.  We've got two trees this year, one for me and one for the boys and that enabled me to decorate my tree all by myself and if I do say so myself, it turned out lovely.

IMGP1533 copy




Friday, November 25, 2011

Familius Activitus

This morning we were going to do a family activity.  The boys rushed our room at 7:35 am and we asked them, "Do you guys want to go to the zoo today?"

"Yes!  The zoo!  I love the zoo," exclaimed the almost five year old.

"The rhino has a butt!" shouted the wee Chickadee.

It was decided.  After cinnamon rolls and the struggle to get showered and dressed we would head to the tippy top of the mountain for the zoo.

Only problem, on the drive up, on the foothills of the mountain, it started to rain.  A very light rain mind you, but rain nonetheless.

Mom and Dad did not want to get wet.  Seeing the light drizzle on the windshield inspired the Dad of the family to change our course.  "What if we go to the new natural history museum instead of the zoo, " he asked?

One boy was psyched.  "Sweet!"  he declared, "I love dinosaurs."
The other boy was disappointed because you see, the rhino has a butt.

We called in the car to make sure that said museum was open and once it was confirmed, we headed up.  Luckily, the new natural history museum is just three minutes away from the zoo.  We got a space to park, admired the view and headed in.

Let me tell you, the museum is awesome.  It is the perfect mix of hands-on kid stuff and grown up fact stuff.  It is bright and colorful and dark and dinosaur-y.  The exhibits are laid out well, the museum flows exceptionally and before you know it, you are at the very top, on the 5th floor, looking at the most amazing, spectacular, breath taking view.

Take a look for yourself.

Anyway, I was impressed and we had fun. In the end, we signed up for a season pass, applying our admission for the day to the final cost for our family to return as often as we'd like. It was a pretty cool day.

New natural history museum. Awesome!

Red chair


My goofy family

Two big dorks.


Wednesday, November 23, 2011


I know a lot of people who do Thanksgiving Trees with their families during the month of November.  I loved the idea but wanted to do something  a little bit different that could really involve my kids.  Before the end of October, Elliott helped me make 24 little envelopes, staple them to ribbon, and hang them across the window.  Then, starting November 1st we set out every single night after dinner to write down the things that we are thankful for.

Us mom and dad?  Our stuff has been pretty standard.  Elliott has really tried hard to be thoughtful.  Wyatt?  Well, lets just say he's really thankful for his butt.

Anyway, I love the kids thoughts so much I thought I'd share a few here.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

Elliott is thankful for:
* having a good day
* a new month of November
* playing in the snow
* have a good day
* ears
* learning a new letter at school
* taco night for dinner
* for mom
* Grandpa Huber
* I got to play with Cy
* Dad could come home kind of early
* fun days at school
* humidifier helped me sleep
* grandma and grandpa
* food to eat
* humidifier is helping my cough
* lights on the Christmas Tree
* toys to play with
* things to eat
* participate in the primary program
* Santa brings presents
* school

The Chick Monster is thankful for:
* I'm thankful for I'm tired
* I like to pick songs (at singing class)
* Old McDonald on moms pink phone
* snow and boogers
* my nose and my eyeball
* how about my butt!
* thankful for my bum
* Doritos
* the big hamster at the pet store
* ice cream
* naps ("I'm just so sleepy")
* moms pink phone
* fruit loops
* my nose
* Mac the truck
* ears
* pasta for dinner
* super bouncy sky ball
* the zoo and the baby elephant and the rhino can poop
* grandma's pasta
* shoots balls
* toe, bed, my friend spot the dog


Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Dance Dance Revolution

It's been a while since my boys and their amazing dance moves have graced the blog.

You wouldn't know it by looking at the dazzling moves and high spirits in the video that shortly after, literally within minutes, both boys were screaming slobbering messes and went to bed early.

It's a holiday week.

Go figure.

Oh, there is music in the background even though you cannot hear it. I have no idea what the group was but when I asked Ross he said, "two white guys who think they are black."

You can try and figure out who that is.

Sunday, November 20, 2011

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas (before Thanksgiving)!

Okay.  It's the Sunday before Thanksgiving.  I've had insomnia for the last 5 nights and my brain hurts, my eyes are puffy, and I have a weird sore on my lip.  My boys started waking up at 5:30 this morning but didn't start fighting until 6:30.  Nothing I love more than getting up before the daylight savings sun on a Sunday morning.

Cue sarcasm........NOW!

The boys are shooting baskets in the kitchen and dad is in the shower.  There is a good inch of snow on the ground and it just started snowing sort of a whippy, swirly mess of tiny flakes.

This morning is the perfect time to show you the goofy Christmas art project I worked on last week.

I bought two blank canvas a while ago and have been trying to figure out what to do with them.  Once I decided Christmas art was in order I painted them my new favorite shade of red (Martha Stewart Maine Lobster) and got to work.






Because I am not very talented, I had to make a stencil(out of freezer paper) for my little painted sign but the stencil worked out great and once I did the touch up work (in red and white) the finished product turned out pretty cute and I've got the perfect place to hang it in my house for the holidays.

And, because I still had another canvas, I went with an idea I had seen online (nothing original here these days) and used the boys to help me with the art project. Want to get your kids all giggly and goofy? Paint their feet!

O Christmas tree. O Christmas tree…feet!

Thursday, November 17, 2011



Sometimes, it's hard for me to remember how lucky I am in this life. That there is greatness surrounding me and it is a blessing in my life. That the decisions made by myself and together with my husband have truly enriched our lives and the lives of our children more than I ever really pay attention to.

Life has been a blur lately. I wake up in the morning, take a deep breath, and get ready for the day. The day is spent doing mom and kid things, housewife and maid things, Martha Stewart and Paula Dean things.

As patiently as I am capable of, I wait for 10:00 pm to roll around. At 10:00, the boys have been in bed for a while, I've done some reading, he's sent his work e-mails, and we finally get the chance to talk to each other.

For the first time all the day long!

He tells me about work and what makes him nervous. I tell him about the day the boys and I had, share my worries and stresses, and sometimes cry like a baby.

He tells me to relax. I tell him that I can't so much, but that I'll try.

We reminisce about the "good old days" before crazy monkeys and revel in the joy our lives feel because those monkeys chase each other around the house with boogers on their fingers and play the atomic fart game on our phones.

Lately, I live for 10:00 pm.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Painting with bubbles!

In order to keep things sane in our house, I try every single day to have a project for the boys.  A craft, a mission, a fort - something to keep them busy for a while.  My boys really like to do artsy crafty stuff, which is right up my alley so it usually works out that our projects involve paint and paper and stickers and lots and lots of glue.

And a major mess.

And a stressed out mom because boys do not follow instructions.

Last Friday I had the idea to play with some bubbles inside.  I'd seen something similar online and figured we could do something fun at the kitchen table.  And, considering both boys were a smidge sick and we were not going out into the butt cold day, indoor bubble painting was born.

There were a few glitches in the craft - straws didn't work and we needed more food coloring in our bubble mix but....BUT.....BUT - these crazy boys of mine kept themselves busy for almost an hour blowing bubbles onto paper and being clever and awesome.

We tried a couple different types of paper and the watercolor paper worked the best.  I think that we might do this again with some big sheets of nice white paper.  It would be a great homemade gift wrap, stationary, or even a good art project to frame.





Today's art project: colored bubbles on water color paper.

Saturday, November 12, 2011

Are you an athlete or an athletic supporter?

When I first moved into the Truman Show seven years ago, I was invited to come and play church volleyball.  It had been years since I'd played, and I was actually thinking about making some friends so I agreed and showed up to play.  I was placed on a team, was stupidly asked what position I play (um, I'm 6 foot 3...I'm totally the team setter and don't know how to block at all!) and stood on the court ready to play.

I can dig if I have to.  I can set if I need to.  I can "spike" if that's what you want to call it.  I am generally good for a couple of blocks a game.

I stood on that court ready to receive service.  The ball came soaring over the net and a woman on my team, whom I later decided was the graveyard shift conductor of the crazy train, kicked the ball instead of trying to use her hands.  The volleyball purist in me was outraged and as soon as I rotated out I picked up my stuff and I left the gym, never to return.

Fast forward 7 years.  I live in a new house, new neighborhood, new ward.  I volunteered to play on the women's volleyball team because I really don't know anyone and was doing a little bit of reaching out - I stepped out of my comfort zone to be social and thought it would be good for me.  It was a frustrating experience, but I still had fun.

I realized that I am like my dad.  I am too competitive when I have something personally at stake.  If I am on a team, or cheering for a particular family member on a team, my blood will boil, I'll yell and rant and rave and I'll give it my all.  A vested interest gets me going and ready for action.  Now, if I have no vested interest, I could care less who wins or loses, but put me on the court and....

Fast forward to last Sunday at church.  I was asked to fill-in on the co-ed volleyball team in a region round robin tournament that was held last night.  At 7:00 pm I showed up at the church ready to play.  So did the five other people on my team - three men and three women in total.  We walked into the gym into a literal herd of people.  There were 40 men and women milling about, none of whom really seemed sure as to what was going on.

It was soon discovered however that the organizer of the round robin tournament wasn't as thorough as he should have been.  He had 4 teams show up when he thought there were only enough people for two teams.  After a lot of buffoonery and "" it was decided by this guy that one, it was our mistake in showing up, not his mistake in lack of planning; and two, that the teams could just easily combine because you know, it's really easy to work 15 people into a 6 person game.

So I played.  The opposing team had two very tall, very cocky young men, probably 19 who by the looks of them, thought that they should have been playing on a nationally ranked NCAA men's team, not standing in a church gym playing with their moms.  I am proud to say that on the first play of the game for me, one of these young men went up to spike the ball into my face and was hit by the shock of his church volleyball career when the tall, 30 pound overweight diabetic mother of two blocked his hit and returned the ball into his face.

Take that, church volleyball!

Throughout the next two matches, I blocked those two boys or dumped it right past their attempted block of me three more times.

Not bad!

Once the game was over I was asked to be a line judge for the next match.  I agreed.  While standing in position, I saw some scuttlebutt between some members of the team I came with and the team we had just played with.  A few minutes later I was told that the old men on the team, who went by the nicknames "Merlin" and "ponch" (because who doesn't want a cool nick name for CHURCH volleyball) had asked that the men on our team not play.  They would keep our women (me, the tall girl and our setter because we were better than the ladies they showed up with), but that they didn't think it was fair for our men (who were taller, younger, stronger and better looking) to play on their team because "they hadn't been to any practices".

So, in grand church ball fashion, people got offended and because I didn't want to stay anyway, I left in a huff with the lot.  Well, I wasn't in a huff, I just felt that I got jipped out of some exercise so I came home and did my Jillian Michaels video.  I do not recommend doing an aerobic exercise video at 8:30 at night.  I didn't sleep.  All night long.  And I messed up my blood sugar and at 2:30 this morning my number was 22 - that's like diabetic coma low and I thought i was going to DIE!  Seriously.  It was terrible.

Anyway - the whole point of all of this?
It's CHURCH BALL.  If you think you are so awesome at church ball that you cannot share the court with someone else then you are just dumb.

Friday, November 11, 2011

What you wish for

Today is quite the day, yes?


it's 11:11 am.

What did you wish for?

I'm not telling you what I wished for.

My boys?

They got ice cream sundaes for breakfast.

Big smiles?  Ice cream for breakfast of course. It's Friday and I'm that kind of mom.

He gets ice cream too. Because he's cute.

It's also Veterans Day.

Thank you Veterans.

I'm not sure what to say about it, except that I've been thinking about this song all morning.  It really has nothing to do with Veterans Day, isn't patriotic at all, but for some reason, it sort of makes me think of America and the beautiful country that I live in.

The song is, "Nature of the Beast" by the Samples (written by Sean Kelly)

It reminds me of road trips and mountains and being a high school history teacher.  I actually made my students listen to this song a couple of times to see what they thought of it.

They didn't care.


Have a great day of elevens.

Thursday, November 10, 2011

I should have been more obvious


I am often reminded that when it comes to letting my husband know that I love him, I am not outwardly affectionate enough.  Which, is true.  That's why I get reminded.  I don't really hug, I'm not too touchy and I keep a lot of my feelings to myself.  I do however, love my husband very much - why else would I do his laundry and fix him dinner every night?

Ross is currently camped out at a local hotel from now until Thanksgiving doing some international training for the last phase of his two year project at work.  He is speaking Spanish every day and hanging out with people from all over the world (Chile, Peru, Argentina, Mexico, Switzerland, Russia and Kazakhstan to be specific).

On Monday afternoon, the boys and I happened to be heading out to run some errands that would drive us right past Ross' hotel.  I thought that it would be funny to leave a little note on his windshield so I quickly grabbed a piece of paper, jotted a few words and jumped in the car.  While stopped at a red light I put on as much gloss as my lips could hold and laid a smooch right on the paper.

I thought, "He has to know this is me!  I laugh in the face of not being a "romantic'!"

The note was then folded in half and placed on the windshield and the boys and I went about our business.  About 45 minutes later he called to say that he was on his way home from work.  

The rest of the conversation went something like this:

Him:  So, when I got out to my car there was this note on my windshield.
Me: Really?  What did it say?
Him:  Yeah, it said call me and has a big kiss on it.  It doesn't say who it's from.  Is it from you?
Me:!  Why would I leave a note on your car (trying to contain my laughter).
Him:  Really?  Well then someone got confused and put a note for someone else on my truck.

When we hung up I couldn't stop smiling.  

Apparently I am so far off the "affection" meter that a note left on my husband's car, obviously from me, doesn't even register in his brain as being from me - he thinks someone made a mistake and left the note on the wrong car.

Once he got home from work, Elliott clarified the note situation at dinner ("Dad, when we went to the Utah store, mom left a note on your car at the hotel!") and there were some blushing cheeks on the adults in the room.

Looks like I've got my work cut out for me in the future.

Tuesday, November 08, 2011

Happy Birthday to my dad!

From the game

My Dad.

Today, he is one year older.

Today, he has to go to work and go to school and then after work and school, he'll get bombarded by crazy grandson's at his house who will jump around and war-hoop and probably break or spill something.  He won't mind though - he'll just clean up the mess when those crazy boys leave.

He'll call one of them Elliott-smelliott.  He'll carry the other one to the car because the Chick always has to have grandpa carry him to the car, as if somehow his legs are broken and cannot carry his 32 pounds.

My dad is such a good dad and grandpa.  He takes care of us, tolerates all of our collective strangeness, and is a hard worker.  I'm so thankful to my dad for making us do stuff with him when we were kids - yard work, home teaching to a bunch of old ladies, and teaching us how to be part of a team....among hundreds of other things.

Happy Birthday Dad!

We love you.

Monday, November 07, 2011

Weighing In


Every three months I go to the endocrinologists office.  The appointment is pretty routine.  I show up a few minutes early, check in with the super skinny and cute receptionist, Anastasia, and then I wait.  I wait to get called back and hoisted up onto the scale.  The scale at that office is evil. I weigh myself before I leave the house every three months for this appointment.  I wear the lightest clothing I own.  I prep for three days before by drinking a lot of water and thinking happy thoughts.  And, it's always the same....I weigh 5-8 pounds MORE at the doctor's office than I do at home.  I'm sure that's the way it works for most people but for me, someone who is already overweight, it just adds insult to injury.

At the beginning of the summer I had one such appointment and hit an all time low - rather high - on the scale.  It was a number I'd been toying with for a while, one that of course I hadn't hit at home, but it was depressing to say the least.  I made a deal with myself and my doctor that I'd really start to do something about it this time - I knew that this summer would give me some opportunity to try and make some changes, but with a move, and life getting int he way, I got a late start.

I  did start in July, when Ross got home from Australia and was working hours that made him accessible to me as a babysitter in the morning.   I started to exercise, at least 4 days a week, in the most consistent manner I'd done for years.  I would walk and jog the track in my neighborhood or I'd go on a power walk around the world.  It was invigorating to be sweating and moving and listening to the music I wanted to listen to - being alone and doing something just for myself was pretty rewarding.  

Then, Ross went back to work and for a couple of weeks I got up super early in the morning, got dressed and hit the pavement.  It was chilly, but those early mornings out walking were amazing.  I loved it a lot more than I thought and really enjoyed watching the sunrise every morning.  But, the weather got cold and by mid September I needed something else.

But not until my 3 months were up and I had to go back to the doctor.

Ug! The doctor.

I had made some changes in my lifestyle, seen some minor results on MY scale, and then headed back.

To be told that I was obese.

To be told by a doctor's office scale that I'd made no progress all summer and weighed a smidge more than I had three months before.

I wanted to cry!

I wanted to scream!

I wanted to grab my doctors spare tire gut and say, "who are you calling fat!!!!!"

But I didn't.

I looked him in the eye and said, "I cannot lose weight and I need help!"

He said, "okay."

We looked through my file and my weight history. I've been going to the same office for 5 years and in 5 years I've gained 46 pounds.  Granted I've had two babies in that time period and became a work from home/stay at home mom, but that's a lot of weight to add to my frame.  Thank heavens I'm six foot three.  One more reason to be grateful for my height.

So, the doc?  He gave me a two month prescription for a commonly prescribed appetite suppressant and told me to take half a pill every morning.  He told me that I had to modify my diet even more and that I had to increase the exercise...just walking, though healthy, wasn't going to cut it.  He even gave me the name of another doctor who specializes in helping people like me (fat from insulin just as much as fat from life) in case I wanted someone else to contact.

I came hope depressed.  I cried a bit in the car!

"Why is this so hard?" I thought to myself.

The weekend before this appointment I was at my moms, looking through photo albums and I found a picture.  A picture of me in a bathing suit so tanned and skinny that I almost threw up.  That picture was taken in an era when I thought I was fat (silly girl!).  That picture is now on my fridge, where I stare at it about 50 times a day.  I analyze that girl.  There is no way on the planet I'll ever look like her again - there really isn't much desire in me to be her again.  But!  BUT!  That girl provides me with some motivation that I was lacking before.

All of this happened in September.  On September 19th I started the quest to stop my own personal insanity.  I started working out with a video (Jillian Michael's busting my butt to be exact!) at least 4 days a week.  Minus the occasional failure like I had this weekend, I've almost entirely stopped eating chips, excessive sugar, bread, pasta, potatoes, rice...all the stuff I know that doesn't work with my diabetic body.  There isn't anything I've cut out completely, but I'm really making an effort.  My portions are smaller.  I'm picking fruit and yogurt for a snack instead of Cheetos.  I'm not fixing as much food for dinner so there is less to sit and pick at.  I'm trying to listen to myself when I go out to eat and not finish everything in front of me just because it's there - sometimes knowing when you are full is a good thing.

And guess what - It took me 7 weeks to do a 30 day video but I did it 30 times.  

And guess what else - I lost 11 pounds doing it.

I know that doesn't seem like much but for me, the girl who has given a half hearted effort to lose weight for over two years, it's a huge deal.  

I'm a little bit proud of myself.

And today - I'm starting all over (except that because of a medication I take, metformin, I get super sick all the time and today is one of those days where I cannot venture too far from the bathroom or stand up straight so I might have to start tomorrow.).  Another 30 days of exercise and diet (thrown into another 6-7 week period because life gets in the way of all goals).

By the end of the year, with increased effort, I'm hoping to dump another 10 lbs in the garbage can.  And then maybe another 10 after that.


I can hardly believe it, but there really is a little tiny light at the end of my dark tunnel right now.  It's a tiny glimmer, but hopefully, as I get closer, it can get a little bit brighter!

Sunday, November 06, 2011

In a nutshell

Weekends seem to take ages to arrive and then they disappear in the blink of an eye.  Totally unfair.  Things in our lives seem to be pretty boring lately, but we're doing our best to try to keep things interesting.  Even if the only interesting we can muster is watching "Shaun the sheep" through the Xbox on netflix on demand.

We've transformed into pilgrims and talk every day about the things we are thankful for.

We've begun our yearly pilgrimage to the University to watch our beloved Runnin' Utes stink it up for yet another season. They may be crappy, and we may only be going to the Saturday games, but we get to do it as a family and take up a whole section of seats. There really isn't anything more fun than that.


We got snow twice in the last week but the stuff on Friday night stuck. The boys woke with cheers and roars and desperation to get outside, even in their pajamas to throw some snowballs. That may have been the best thing to happen, this silent ushering in of winter, that they boys have seen in a long time.


Related Posts with Thumbnails