Finding a voice

Something we all work at, right? Finding our voice, our place in society, our role as a child, a spouse, a parent, a student....

I found my voice years ago, I think. Sometimes it falters, but early on I formed opinions and forged my existence - the high road - like robert frost said, "the road less taken".

I've always wanted to stand out - but not be noticed. Be a friend, but not have to be thanked. Be like my mom, but a little more on time (mom, remember all those times you were supposed to pick me up from school in Jr. High and you never came and I walked home? That's what I mean).

Today sucked. One of those icky, can't stand my life sort of days. Toilet training may be harder on the parent than the child. That's what I've decided anyway.

Tonight though, I went to my little brother's junior high choir concert. He was the only blond haired blue eyed boy in the whole concert choir. He stood out. He is finding his voice.

He loves to sing. He has always loved to sing. He sings all day long.

I love to sing with him.

His choir posse tonight did a rendition of "stand by me". It was pretty cool. He stood in the back, a little shy and embarassed, but sang loud and proud. If only his choir teacher could hear him sing that song on Friday's after school with Chunky and Allen and Parkie in the basement. Then, he'd have done a solo.

My two year old also loves to sing - he sings all day long. He has a new song. The tune fluctuates, but the words go like this: "I never get to go outside in the snow and the rain...."

I can't wait to see the blond blue-eyed boy that he'll turn into.



And Chicker? He's finding his voice, too. His voice is loud and powerful. He is making his presence known - and boy do I know what he's telling me. I don't know what he sounds like, but he screams all the day long. Since he doesn't sleep much, that's a lot of hours of loud, boisterous noise.



Imagine this screaming - this happy excited to be alive screaming, all day long.

Every single day.

remember - he doesn't nap.