What a night!

For the 3 of you who read this blog - please tell me that the following doesn't just happen in my house.

My mom says it's called, "being a parent", whatever that means.

Our night last night - in a nutshell

7:00 pm - stand in LONG line to get tickets for high school football game season opener.

7:15 pm - find our seats with family, sit facing the sun, baby is whiny, watch the game.

8:30 pm - baby climbing on bleachers falls and bangs head. stand on the grass and see 4 of my former high school students milling around. (I quit teaching almost 6 years ago - why are they still hanging around high school football games?)

8:50 pm - scream, yell, freak out. My brother, a sophomore, gets into the varsity game as a lineman. We all were beside ourselves - it was awesome. Glad we stayed until the end.

9:15 pm - drive home from game. boys fall asleep. get them home and in bed.

9:45 - 11:00 pm - Ross and I wrap up shavy jones business for the night, hang out, read books, go to sleep.

12:45 am - I wake up sweating. Oh no! low blood sugar. yep - number is 31. crap. Binge in the kitchen while shaking. Sit at the kitchen table for 45 minutes because I don't think that my legs will carry me upstairs.

1:35 am - back in bed.

1:45 am - Elliott up SCREAMING! first thought - oh no! he's going to throw up. Ross races into his room and he's drowning in his own boogers. Allergies. he won't blow his nose. he won't drink some water. we hold a towel up to his face - want to save the carpet from 3 year old puke. He screams and gags for 25 minutes before he finally starts to calm down. Dad gives up. I try to help. he finally tells me that he has to go to the bathroom. He pees GALLONS in the dark. hadn't been to the bathroom since 6:30 before the football game.

he decides he wants his pajamas on and for me to lay down with him. he takes several deep breaths - in through the nose, out through the mouth - and is back to sleep within 10 minutes.

2:45 am - I climb back in bed. Chicker starts crying. i get out of bed, go to him and shove his bink back in his mouth.

2:50 am - back in bed. head hits the pillow and BAM! Kid SCREAMING. Not crying but screaming. He's been sick - (think butt on fire) and I'm nervous. I race to him, check his diaper, shove his bink back in his mouth and climb back in bed.

3:00 am - screaming again. One more round of the binker game.

3:05 am - head hit the pillow and I'm out like a light. gonzo.

3:30 am - the Chick is up screaming again. I don't hear him - Ross does and gets up with him. They are both up until 5:00 am.

5:00 am - everyone is asleep. Finally.

6:30 am - Chick is awake. Again. Ross turns the TV in his room on and leaves him alone.

9:20 am - I wake up, roll over and look at my clock. Once I recognize how late it is I roll over to Ross. He's a zombie. So tired. We hear talking and yelling and playing. Oh, the boys are awake. Shock!

9:30 am - I get out of bed, pee, and venture into Chick's room. It looks like a bomb went off.  There are ripped tissues and wet wipes all over the floor.  Furniture is turned over.  Toys are everywhere.  The crib contains every stuffed animal in the entire house (thanks to big brother) and one angry 15 month old. 

Why is he angry? I'm not sure until I see slimy brown streaks in several locations on his crib sheet. Can you say, "exploding diaper"?

I get him out, put him on the changing table and reach for a diaper.

guess what.

no more diapers.

they are all down stairs.

I then pick up the exploding poo butt, carry him downstairs, get a couple diapers and come back up to put him in the bath.

he escapes and i catch him just as he and his nasty rear end (yes, he's still wearing the icky diaper) are about to climb on a very nice chair.

good thing I'm fast.

Phew!

How was your night last night?